Funny Jokes

The Greatest Jokes (According to Sebastian Maniscalco)

Plus watch a bonus joke from Sebastian Maniscalco above.

Good Will Hunting, Matt Damon to Robin Williams: A plane takes off, and once it’s leveled out at its cruising altitude, the pilot finishes addressing the passengers. Thinking his microphone is off, the pilot then mumbles to himself, “I’d love a blowjob and a cup of coffee.” Of course the passengers hear this, so one of the female flight attendants rushes toward the cockpit to let the captain know his mic is still on. As she runs up the aisle, one of the male passengers yells out, “Don’t forget the coffee.” —SEBASTIAN MANISCALCO

ABOUT THE COMEDIAN: “I can only speak for myself—I think relatability and timing,” stand-up comedian Sebastian Maniscalco says of what makes a great joke. “If I can relate to the joke, it’s going to be funny. Plus, the art of timing, which is important when you do stand-up comedy.” The comic, whose Showtime special Aren’t You Embarrassed premiered last year, adds, “It took me a good eight to ten years to really formulate what I was doing onstage and start to get really personal with comedy. I always really had timing naturally, it was just about trying to figure out how that timing was going to work onstage. I’ve been doing it for almost 18 years now.”

He’s happy to be here at the Comedy Store in LA, where he recounts a few favorite jokes. “This is my workout room,” the comedian says, looking around the venue. “I feel very comfortable here. This has always been my club since I got out here in 1998. I did a comedy class here that year and I didn’t know anything about stand-up. After that I started working the clubs and the open-mic night. This club seemed to always speak to me and I still come here when I’m off the road.”

The DVD of Maniscalco’s special arrives on July 14 and the comedian is on tour throughout the rest of the year. He has always been a fan of comedy, even since childhood, and is gratified to finally be doing this as his full-time career. “I used to devour a lot of stand-up comedy in my cousin’s basement,” he laughs. “He had cable and I didn’t, so I went there and saw all the comedians.” His favorites? “I don’t like long jokes. I like stories, rather than setup punchlines.”


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Cecilia Castaneda

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